The Facade

On social media - I have seen a couple posting exotic vacation pictures every month (making everyone feel what a great couple they were) and then they got divorced in a few years. You will see people posting pictures partying with their 'friends', but they would nowhere be close to being 'friends', some barely know anything about each other, and some dislike some of them. I have seen people posting amazing pictures with their kids, the very same people who would be spending hardly any time with their kids otherwise. Social media is a facade where people want to share just the good things and show that they live in a rosy la la land but far is the case.

Social media is setting us up for feeling low as if everyone is having fun but us. I have shared this before why I had deactivated my FB account. I am on it now but I am subscribed to just 6 people - Narendra Modi, Aamir Khan, Rujuta Diwekar being 3 of them. I do not want to see what people are drinking, eating, where they are vacationing, who are they hanging out / partying with or what their kids are drawing, it is way too much information for me than what I care to know. I do not visit anyone's profiles as well.

What I have learned from my social media (FB and blogging) experience is -

- Life is not perfect for ANYONE - even if they are trying hard to portray it that way

- It might seem that everyone has it better than you, but they really don't

- Don't believe everything that people write on their blogs/FB posts. People lie. Or there are some like me who reveal just 5% of their life. People have lines drawn for what part of their life they want to share and what they do not want to share.

Social media can cause depression and the feeling of missing out.. If you get affected by the information that is shared by people on social media (that means if you feel low, inferior, jealous, sad, bad, negative and whatnot) then unsubscribe to people who are not adding any value and also think about how much time you want to spend on its usage...

Jeans: American Eagle, Shoes Vaneli, Top: Macy's, Vegan Leather Jacket: Blank NYC

Highschool Sweethearts....

I think while it is great that some people are high school sweethearts and they find love early in life and stick-it-out till the end, personally, I am happy with all the experiences - the first crush, emotional upheaval, broken hearts - the whole nine yards. Having those experiences made me feel alive and made life interesting. So it is definitely worth having gone through it all. I wouldn't trade it for anything but ... I would not go back to that either... I feel a lot of people choose the same - they keep the amazing memories but let the people go because people grow up differently, as they figure out who they are, they end up wanting different things in life.

Skirt: Ann Taylor (12 years old), Shoes: DSW (11 years old), Sweater: Modcloth, Tights: Target

Past Present Future

Once in a while I mull over my actions and or beliefs from a few years back and I reach the same conclusion every time - "I can not believe, how naïve (aka dumb) I was!" 

Looking back I never think I was all that intelligent. I could have done things differently. Done them better. I could have been more confident, studied more, played more, created more, snapped out of inferiority complex or had the ability to judge people better. I am not telling you my regrets. It is a mere analysis and aftermath of what goes on in my head.

The 'present me' gives the 'past me' that aggrieved feeling, the kind one gets when they cannot believe that someone can be that disillusioned (aka stupid).

Do you ever feel unhappy with the 'past you'? 

Well, never mind, here's to the better 'present us' which we will be looking back as past in the future!

 Photo 1: Dress - Nordstrom Rack, Sweater: J crew factory, Shoes: Don't remember, Tights: Target

Photo2: Dress - Calvin Klein, Sweater - Calvin Klein, Shoes: UGG, Tights: Target

Gut Health

All disease begins in the gut, and all diseases must be addressed by improving gut health.

2 combos:

Top: Ann Taylor, Jeans: American Eagle, Shoes: Steve Madden

Shoes: Kelly and Katie

Love/Hate

The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference! What do you think?

Skirt: Banana Republic

Top: Charter's Club

Sweater: J crew factory

Shoes: Circa

Tights: DSW

Just...

This is a personal style blog so one may expect that I should be writing about nails, colors, trends, what's in and fashion.

But in all honesty, it is nauseating to read or write about fashion, trends, nails, colors, shoes, designers, blah!  Ironical for someone with a personal style blog to say that? Yeah! it is good to dress well, have some swagger and whatnot, but let's face it, at the end of the day they are just clothes, just shoes. And it is just another day! 

Dress: Calvin Klein (10 years old)

Shoes: Don't Remember (12 years old)

Tights: Target (5 years old)

Scarf: J Crew Factory (4 years old)

Insignificant...

At the end of the day, it is just a blog. You can dress it up with however many advertisements as you want or fill it with however many pretty photos of yourself, but until there's a true passion driving it and some sort of the point, it's always going to be just another shallow, insignificant part of the internet.

Dress: Esprit

Sweater: Modcloth

Tights: Target

Shoes: Circa

Good Friends

Good friends are hard to find, difficult to leave and impossible to forget ...

(Now) Jeans: J crew, Top: Banana Republic, Shoes: Steve Madden

Empty voids

We are all surrounded by chemicals. Our soap, shampoo, perfume, deodorants, house cleaning supplies, dishwasher soap, laundry soap, sometimes water that we drink, air that we breathe, the food that we eat (grown with pesticides/ fertilizers), clothes that we wear (processed with chemicals and dyes), everything is loaded with chemicals and toxins. To add to that we, with our own 'conscious will' decide to indulge in some more toxins like alcohol, drugs, cocktails, chocolates-deserts-ice-creams made with liquid nitrogen, preserved foods.

Humans have these empty voids that they try to fill up with some crazy entertainment (which is mostly consumption - as mentioned above). We have moved away from the natural living big time.

We need to eat clean, simple food, explore variety but keep it simple, respect food. Food gives us energy, it was us, it is us, it repairs us, we are what we eat/drink and what we digest, food is sacred. There is nothing safe in consuming alcohol, drugs or food loaded with chemicals (molecular gastronomy!), even though the argument will be, it is safe in small quantities. We are surrounded by toxins already, we don't need to add more to our body.

Change is required in the way we eat, move, sleep and think...

Dress: Mark and Spencer, Turtleneck: Banana Republic, Shoes: Circa Joan and David, Tights: Target

What the health! Part 13 - How to lose weight and stay healthycontinued...

This is part 13 of ‘What the health’ series. You can find earlier parts here – part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8,  part 9, part 10, part 11, part12

2. Diet (2)

For gut health -

1. You can make your gut stronger by eating simple, non-spicy, healthy, easy to digest food.  Spicy food, pepper, chilies destroys stomach lining and causes acid imbalance. Remember food stays in your mouth only for a few seconds while your stomach and intestine have to deal with it for a longer time.


2. If I may say so consume a poor man's diet and by that, I mean Indian poor man's diet and not an American poor man's diet.


3. Don’t go after fancy diet plans, fancier the names the crappier that they are. Our body needs wholesome food, it needs carbs, fats, proteins, and everything - remember moderation is the key.


4. Recognize the difference between food and food-like products.


5. Take out some time during the day to plan and cook home-cooked meals, eat clean, fresh, home-cooked, simple food - as easy as that.


6. Don't forget to drink a glass of fresh homemade buttermilk every day (not yogurt, but homemade buttermilk), it encourages good digestion.


7. When traveling - I ate the unhealthiest food when I traveled and always put on at least 5 pounds as an aftereffect. Now when I travel I book houses with kitchens through Airbnb and such and cook simple meals even on vacations.

to be continued...

Jeans: American Eagle

Shirt: J Crew Factory

Jacket: J Crew

Shoes: Lifestride

What the health: part 12 - How to lose weight and stay healthycontinued...

This is part 12 of ‘What the health’ series. You can find earlier parts here – part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8,  part 9, part 10, part 11

2. Diet (1)

When I was little eating out at restaurants was an event, the event probably happened once a year...

Times have changed and we eat at restaurants casually. Most of the social gatherings happen around food and drinks, it has become a social norm... Looking at the kind of schedule today's parents have I am sure the next generation of kids will be saying 'when we were little, eating home-cooked food was an event'.

Our treatment towards our gut has definitely become very casual, to add to that we engage in things like frozen, processed foods, alcohol, coke/Pepsi and whatnot. The wealthier than our wallets get the unhealthier the food choices that we make.

Would it be too much if I said 90% of the health troubles we go through are because of bad diet and unhealthy gut? It is true. A quarter of what we eat keeps us alive and the rest keeps our doctors alive.

We are what we eat and most importantly we are what we digest. Gut health is responsible for so many things - the chemical, hormonal, bacteria balance, for strong immunity, a good emotional/mental balance, healthy skin and feeling of wellbeing. Having a strong digestive system is a key element in losing weight too. People who are depressed or committing suicide have a bad digestive tract and I am not talking out of my ass, it is proven scientifically. Read the book 'Gut: an inside story' to find the details about the research on this topic and more on gut health.

We need to think before we put anything inside our own gut... are we adding value and nutrition to our own body or poison? Our gut is strong but not as strong to take the insults that we perform each day. Do not take your gut for granted and treat it as a garbage can just to sweep the dishes clean.

And PLEASE provide your kids with home-cooked fresh healthy food - healthy does not mean organic and raw food. In their growing years the kids need nutrition, what they consume right now is also defining the kind of food habits they will have in the future and what you give them right now is building or destroying their gut health. A lot of people are under the risk of catching ailments and getting obese at a very young age because since they were kids they were fed restaurant food/ unhealthy/ frozen/ processed foods by ignorant, lazy and irresponsible parents.

Good gut health and exercising habit is the best heritage you can leave for your kids.

to be continued...

Dress: J crew

Sweater: Nordstrom Rack

Tights: DSW

Shoes: Ellen Tracy

What the health: part 11 - How to lose weight and stay healthy?

This is part 11 of ‘What the health’ series. You can find earlier parts here – part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8,  part 9, part 10

There are a few key elements when it comes to health... it is no rocket science... everyone knows what they are -

1. Exercise -

Take out some time every day to exercise! Not having time to exercise is like saying I don't have time to do the basic things like brush my teeth. A lot of people do not want to join the gym because they do not want to spend any money on it, while they do have the money to gather material possessions. Health is the best investment one can make!

Running a marathon once in a blue moon and then forgetting all about exercising until there is a marathon again is not the way to go about it. Exercise every day, rain or shine, even if it is just 30 minutes of yoga each day.

Think of making exercise a fun time so that you don't have to struggle each day to find motivation - join some fun classes like Zumba or dance of any sort, kickboxing, pilates, do yoga - there are so many good videos available on youtube, go hiking/biking or play sports with friends, try weight lifting, the list is endless. Whatever you do, do not do lazy man's workout. You will see these kinds of people when you hit the gym, they are there may be to watch TV, listen to songs, look around at some good looking people, I don't know but if you are spending time on something they might as well make the best out of it.

Not only does exercise tone your body so you can wear your favorite jeans, but it also strengthens your muscles, keeps your bones strong, improves your skin, increases relaxation (stress release), betters sleep and mood, your immune function gets stronger, and a lot more …

If you haven't then exercise today!

To be continued...

Dress: M collection

Shoes: Me Too

Necklace: Modcloth

What the health - Part 10 - More reasons you are not losing weight

This is part 10 of 'What the health' series. You can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8,  part 9

9. Poor Digestion

You are not what you eat; you are what you digest and absorb!

Our gut health determines our overall wellbeing. The bacteria that lie in our gut help us to fight disease, process our food, make nutrients and make hormones. When your liver is sluggish, it struggles to process substances/toxins/hormones efficiently and this leads to toxic build-up and this will inevitably cause weight gain.

I would suggest fixing your digestion by eating simple and easy to digest foods, do not forget to drink one glass of buttermilk every day (not yogurt but homemade buttermilk).

10. Don't Drink Water

Last but not the least, we have all heard how important H2O is when it comes to shedding pounds. It helps to suppress appetite, so you're less likely to overeat. Staying hydrated keeps all chemical reactions going on in your body run smoothly and it fixes metabolism. It allows your kidneys to function properly and filter everything that they need to. Water is great for skin too.

How much water should you drink? It depends on how much you weigh, what climate you live in and how much you work out. 0.5+ ounce per 1 pound of body weight, so if you weigh 150 pounds you would be drinking (75+ ounces (2.2 liters))+ (if you live in a hot climate then few more ounces) + (if you work out each day then few more ounces). I drink 3 liters (more or less) every day.

coming up in the next posts... how to lose weight and stay healthy

Top: Charters's Club

Skirt: J crew factory

Shoes: nine west

What the health: Part 9 - More reasons you are not losing weight...

This is part 9 of 'What the health' series. You can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8

6. Same old routine

You do not switch your workouts and rely on the same routine day-in-day-out. Your body gets accustomed to your workout and is not challenging it enough to make a difference. It is good to mix things up and try and do a different activity every day, or at least every week.

7. Inconsistency

If you don't work out regularly, you do not see results. Consistency is the key! There is no way around hard work.

8. Sedentary Lifestyle

Just working out might not be enough, if your remaining of the day is stationary or is spent on a chair. Try and take a walking break. Experts recommend setting a timer on the computer to remind you to move every hour. Take the stairs instead of the elevator, park far away from the mall, run with your kids and whatnot.

Skirt: Gap

Top: Guess

Shoes: Mix No. 6

What the health: Part 8 - Reasons you are not losing weight continued..

This is part 8 of 'What the health' series. You can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6, part 7

3. All cardio, no strength

Don’t spend all your time on cardio - focus on weight/strength training too. Weights do not make you bulky or muscular. Instead not only does it prevent injury by strengthening the joints, but it also builds muscle mass and increases metabolic rate.

4. No accountability

You assume that because you are opting for healthier food options and working-out so it is a reason enough to overindulge. I have seen people eating four ice creams in one go just because they are opting for a sugar-free option. Don't do that, our body does not need so much food.

Contrary to popular belief eating and shopping can not be hobbies and can not be used as stress release therapy because therapy is a treatment that fixes you for good instead of giving just a momentary pleasure. Food and shopping is a strategy... one simply needs to learn the strategy.

5. No Food Planning/ snacking on the wrong foods

Have healthy snacks and meal options ready at home and at work - at all times - otherwise, if you are hungry you will end up eating unhealthy things. Don't snack on cookies and candy, instead of on simple foods such as nuts, raisins, quinoa, fruits, salads, upma, thalipit, khichadi, daal rice, soups, buttermilk, yogurt, protein shake...

To be continued...

Jeans: Abercrombie and Fitch

Shirt: J crew Factory

Shoes: Me Too

What the health: Part 7 - Reasons you are not losing weight

This is part 7 of 'What the health' series. You can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5, part 6

1 - You are in denial

One day I went on a hike with a hiker friend, this was the year when I weighed a lot - 170 pounds to be specific. After finishing the excruciating hike we stopped at a restaurant for dinner. She ordered a plate of idli sambhar and I ordered a dosa, which is the longest dosa I have ever seen, I could eat only 25% of it.

During dinner, the hiker said "people are lucky to have good genetics and metabolism - they eat anything and still don't put on weight. I hardly eat anything, I do these strenuous hikes and still put on weight".

While she said this she finished the food that she had ordered and the 75% of dosa that was left on my plate.

We think we are doing everything right - we are eating right, exercising - even if it is one excruciating hike once in a while, and everyone who is in shape is just lucky. Do not conveniently ignore and forget that 75% extra that we are consuming.

From this incident I learned, I was in denial too.  I sat - analyzed and found so many things that I needed to change (mid-night snacking anyone?). I needed to take control of my health than it controlling me.

If today I am in shape or feeling light and right - it is not because of luck- it is because I came out of denial - I changed my entire lifestyle (from diet, exercise, sleep, habits, organization-prioritization skills to managing stress) - and obviously I had to put in efforts to do so. Do not be in denial and say that you are doing everything right, take an objective look at what you are doing wrong and try to fix it.

2. You are finding lame excuses

Do not blame being fat or unhealthy on genetics, metabolism or horoscopes!

A list of lame excuses is covered in earlier parts. or you can find it here

to be continued ...

Skirt: Gap (12 years old)

Top: Loft (8 years old)

Shoes: Impo (4 years old)

What the health: Part 6 - Lame excuses continued

This is part 6 of 'What the health' series. You can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3, part4,  part 5

15. It hurts my body

If you have never worked out then yes, it would hurt for the first few days. But go past that and then you would get addicted to that 'good' pain. Stretch before and after a workout, get a massage once in a while, soak in warm water with Epsom salt.

16. Exercise make me more hungry

Yes! That happens. The best solution to that is to have a protein shake right after your workout and have a lot of healthy snacks - fruits, salads, nuts. Munch on them every 2 hours even if you are NOT hungry.

17. I don't know where to start

That's fine. Just start with walking for 30 mins, do yoga at home, what helps the most is joining classes - you pay for it so you show up and then it is easier to work out in a group of people...the atmosphere keeps you motivated.

18. I am already skinny (thin)

A lot of people are skinny on the outside and have unhealthy fat reserves inside, some are skinny and have no energy to do anything, you can be thin but chances are you are not fit … so exercise and eat healthy home-cooked food!

I hope this helps and gives you a kick in the butt... exercise today if you haven’t already.

Skirt : Gap (12 years old)

Top: Old Navy (7 years old)

Shoes: Nine West (4 years old)

What the health: Part 5 - Lame excuses continued...

This is part 5 of 'What the health' series, you can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3, part4

10. I can't live without junk food

There is this waterfall in Jasper, Canada and there is a board put up everywhere around it - it says don’t step on the rocks near the waterfall, they are very slippery and people have died here. People still cross the fence and walk on the rocks to take selfies. That means they accept the risk of dying a bad and untimely death out of their own stupidity.

Anyway coming back to the point if you can not live without junk food then no one can help you there. You have to make a choice. If you can't live without junk food then make peace with living in a junk-body.

11. I don't like gyms

Do you like parks? mountains? lakes? anything? Find a place you like and incorporate that activity as your workout. Running, Skiing, Tennis, Badminton, Dancing ...? There must be something. And if you don't know what you like yet, then try them all and I am sure one would click.

I do something different every day - yoga, hiking, biking, kickboxing, dance, pilates, tennis, badminton, weight training and whatnot (whether I like it or not!).

12. I am too old

Seriously, you are not. Meet Fauja Singh and Ernestine Shepherd. If you still think you are old then shame on you!

13. I hate working out alone

Join a group class, a running group, ask a friend to join you ... there are a lot of options. If not hiking/ biking or doing yoga at home then I prefer to workout at group classes, that motivate me the most.

14. It is boring

That is because you haven't explored all your options. Find something you enjoy. (and honestly do it anyway.)

to be continued...

Dress: J crew

Shoes: Me too

What the health: Part 4 - Some more lame excuses -

This is part 4 of 'What the health' series, you can find earlier parts here - part1, part2, part3

Yes! I am determined to cover all lame excuses I have heard (or have used myself)

7. Diets make me hungry.

If your diet is making you hungry, it's not a good diet or even sustainable in the long term. Don't go for any fancy (or trending) diet plans, fancier the name of the diet the crappier that it is - our body needs everything - carbs, proteins, and whatnot - all in moderation, don't cut back on anything. Do watch your portion size and eat healthy, simple food - healthy does NOT mean just organic or raw food.

8. Exercise makes me too tired.

No kidding! That is why they call it a workout! Jokes aside, exercise generates energy. The more energy you have, the more you will get done every day.

I generally workout in the morning but if for some reason I don't, and have to work out in the evening, that is after a long day at work - then I do not feel like moving even a limb. But I still put on my shoes and do what I am supposed to, 5 minutes through the workout I start feeling charged.

You recharge your body through food, sleep, and exercise. Movement creates energy. It gets your heart pumping, blood pumping, cleans out toxins, and gets your engine started. Exercise helps you lose weight, makes your skin glow and gets confidence levels up so you feel better about yourself.

9. I always gain back the weight.

When I decided to lose weight and make changes to my lifestyle there were months in a row I didn't lose even a single pound and there were some months when I put on weight instead of losing. Losing weight isn't a crash course, if you don't see instant results then don't give up, there needs to be patience and most of all continuity (for life).

I told someone to try yoga, she came back to me and said ‘I tried it for 3 whole weeks and didn’t lose even a pound’. Isn’t 3 weeks too less? considering you have taken years to ruin your body?… give it time… Rome wasn't built in one day ... it would be a long journey but it would be worth it. Don't do it to be thin, do it for a better quality of life.

One needs to change their lifestyle for good to lose weight otherwise if you resume unhealthy ways once losing weight then obviously you will be putting on the weight again.

to be continued...

Jeans: Abercrombie and Fitch

Shoes: Me too

Shirt: J crew Factory

What the health: Part 3 - Excuses we use for not losing weight(continued)

(part1, part2)

4. I don't have money for a gym or personal trainer

:-)

I have seen people spending loads of money on material things, brands, jewelry, 100 shoes/purses, and whatnot but when it comes to taking care of their own body they say 'it costs too much'.

Here is blunt advice - I would suggest stop buying jewelry - it won't make you look or feel good as much as a fit body would - spend the money on joining a gym. There are so many free options to workout too - go hiking, biking, there are innumerable exercise videos online, play music and dance your heart out, don't forget yoga - you can do it anywhere and anytime.

5. I love food a lot, in general

Great. Who doesn't? But you don't have to eat it all in one meal, do you? People eat in such quantities as if they are coming straight out of a famine and are not going to get next meal on their plate, remember there is always the next time, also remember that food stays in your mouth only for a few seconds and inside your stomach for very long, don’t give in for momentary pleasures, the high of having a fit body is way too long-lasting.

Do not eat according to the health of your wallet! Wealthier that the wallets get unhealthier the food habits become. If I may say so - eat a poor man's diet and by that, I don't mean American poor man's diet - I mean Indian poor man's diet - it is simple and easy to digest.

6. My weight problems are genetic

No, they are not, and I am not saying this - scientific research is. It is just too convenient to blame it on genetics.

To be continued…

Skirt: Ann Taylor (also worn here)

Top: Loft

Shoes: Steve Madden