I have the least possible expectations of people. It doesn't mean I have given up on mankind. It only means that I like to give everyone some space to be whoever they want to be and whatever they want to do. It is not easy but not impossible either. Every time I feel a 'grudge' or 'bitterness' growing inside me, for someone failed me or didn't live up to my expectation, I tell myself 'everyone is doing the best they can!', I also like to cut people some slack, for example, if I am visiting someone and they are not welcoming enough or not the perfect hosts then I understand and say 'it's okay, they have kids to take care of and busy, stressful lives to be asking for attention'. I don't whine about it.
There is already so much stress in life, simply to even exist, why add to the drama with unnecessary expectations? The problem arises when people do not realize that they themselves were never up to the mark and express their grudge against you for not living up to their expectations - meaning they would expect a birthday card from you even though they themselves never wished you on your birthday. Lame example. But that is how lame expectations are.
Anyway, I think you get the gist. Before you blame people for not doing something, ask yourself if you had done anything for them, also cut some slack - people go through ups and downs, depression, sickness, newborns, crazy work schedules, various phases and basically people have issues that you don't know about - think from their perspective before you jump to conclusions - give them benefit of doubt. It will give you some peace of mind...
There is already so much stress in life, simply to even exist, why add to the drama with unnecessary expectations? The problem arises when people do not realize that they themselves were never up to the mark and express their grudge against you for not living up to their expectations - meaning they would expect a birthday card from you even though they themselves never wished you on your birthday. Lame example. But that is how lame expectations are.
Anyway, I think you get the gist. Before you blame people for not doing something, ask yourself if you had done anything for them, also cut some slack - people go through ups and downs, depression, sickness, newborns, crazy work schedules, various phases and basically people have issues that you don't know about - think from their perspective before you jump to conclusions - give them benefit of doubt. It will give you some peace of mind...
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